Sunday, January 3, 2010

Took pictures today...

and I didn't want to do it. But I did. I was going to have someone else do it for me, but then I was too horrified... so I did it myself, in the bathroom with a mirror. Worked well, sorta, because I kept my face covered-- which was important to me...
To say I'm not disgusted with myself would be a lie. To say that I haven't tried very hard wouldn't be too much of a lie. Yes, it's been a rough year. Yes, there is stuff that makes it hard. But, when I looked at myself- I have to take ownership. I did this with a little help from things outside my control. I know I'm a stress eater, my husband feeds that. I need to be stronger and I told him I need him to be stronger for me. I'm worried about my health. My blood pressure is crazy. I don't want meds, and I've given myself a March deadline before I go to the doctor for it.


I'm going to make 2010 the best year for my health that I can. I'm going to try to not fixate on getting/staying pregnant. I need me to be healthy. That's what I am going to work on. These pictures are what will help me carry on.

I can use all the support I can get...

2 comments:

Jack Sh*t, Gettin' Fit said...

Good for you for reclaiming your health and your body. I was a stress eater, too, as well as a boredom eater, car eater, entertainment eater... hell, I had a half dozen reasons for eating that had nothing whatsoever to do with hunger.

You can definitely do this. Good luck making 2010 a kick-ass year!

gramwalks said...

Great post. Mom