Tuesday, January 15, 2013

White girl can't cardio pump

I tried a new class tonight at the YMCA. 

"Cardio Pump."

I spent about an hour talking myself into going... I don't know why it's so hard for me to go, I never regret it... I guess it's more of I want someone to go with.  A friend to enjoy my misery with. 

Anyhow- I went!  And it was basically like a step class with no step, just on the ground.  Which is great- I *LOVE* step!!  So I was all gung ho, and about 20 minutes in, after a zillion (okay, like 20) squats- I thought my thighs would give out on me.  Then we got into more dance stuff.

Let me tell you, this white girl has got no groove.  I accidentally moved into the range of the mirrors-- oh the horror of seeing myself!  I looked like a fish flopping on the sand.  It was awful.  But, I kept plowing along.  Then I was watching the clock, class started at 5:30, there was a 6:30 TurboKick class (which I planned on going to also) and it was 6:20.  People were lining up in the hallway and peeking in.  Then I heard giggling...

I know the laughing could have been anything... and people peeking in-- well, people do that.  *I* do that.  But my inner idiot told me, "Melzie-- they are laughing at your fat @ss in hot pink pants, trying to move and lose weight."  I couldn't shut up II, I did try... it was rather depressing... and I felt my arms failing more and more. 

At 6:30 she ended the class, and all the hot people walked in (okay, not everyone was hot- but 97% of them were) and I was even more horrified by who might have seem me.  Thankfully, there were no kids from school there.  Last week (during TurboKick) there were 2!  I'm proud that I stayed, lol.)

Now as I relax after a super hot shower, wishing my legs would work better than they do (ouch, ouch, ouch, ouch) and wishing I had some groove to my swing-- I am glad I went.  I'm not glad I heard laughter... but I guess if I would to see a hot pink, panted fish on the sand... I might giggle also.

1 comment:

Misc Mom said...

I know the feeling. The feeling like people are laughing, but you keep going and you keep giving it all you got and one day you will be the hot person walking in. My motto for 2013 is if it doesn't challenge you it doesn't change you. I attribute that to not only the physical aspect of weight loss but the mental aspect. Even though they probably were not giggling at you, even if they were people are mean. They are mean to fat people, skinny people, ugly, beautiful. Mean people will be mean regardless of what you weigh. They will find something if that is in their character. So, try not to care and the more you try not to care the more you won't. :) Because the only opinion that really counts is yours and if you felt good doing Cardio Pump (I so wanna try!) then you should do it gosh darnit! CHEERS!