First week down.

Starting is always easy, staying with it is the trick.  That's where I've fallen.. where I've come to forget what I want.  I've talked with my good friends, my husband, and even my 17 year old.  They know that I want this.  I've spent the last year doing nothing but school, work, and family.  Literally.  I've gained a lot of pounds, but I reached the goal I needed.

But, then I looked at the price.  My health.

This summer is about me.  About my need to regain the health I had.  My goal is to lose weight, but mostly just to become active again.  I have attached no pounds to the summer, but I would love to lose at least 20.

I weighed this morning, Sunday's or Monday's are going to be my day.  Really, Sunday will be easier because my husband wants to do this also.

My weigh in was:  302.6 pounds.
A loss of 3.4 pounds.

I talked to my friend yesterday while we were having a pedi and sushi.  She asked what I've done this week.  Truth be known, not a whole lot.  I've only concentrated on drinking more water.  However, I have allowed for some Dr Pepper.  I've concentrated on eating more veggies and fruits.  However, I have enjoyed chips & dip as well.

I don't want to give up anything.  I want to do this my way and that means occasionally having food that isn't so good for me.

This week I'm going to focus on more movement. Starting out slow because of my "bad body."  (Bad knees, bad feet, bad ankle, and possibility of easy dislocations.)  Here is to week 2!

Summer '16 goals

I'm seriously embarrassed by the lack of posting.  Over a year.... and the numbers shows it.

Today I start my "summer."  I'm working on kicking out my soda habit.  I'm going to exercise, because I've seriously done nothing in the last year but school, work, be a mom, sleep, and school some more.

I weighed this morning at 306.

Then I cried.

Then I put on exercise clothes, took my pills/vitamins, reviewed my pinterest health and exercise boards, logged on to this, and made a commitment to myself.

I will use this summer wisely.  I will make a difference in myself and my well being.  I will not treat my body as a dumping ground.

Now, I'm off to plant my stuff in our new garden, we've moved/bought a house, and then whack the hell out of my new thingie in the garage.

Weigh in #2 in 2015

Weigh In #2, 1/11/2015

I wasn't sure I wanted to step on the scale this morning.  I've been hit and miss this week, my first full week of being on track.  I know that it was a "real" week for me.  I was pretty good, but not perfect.  I packed lunches, but we did eat out 2 meals.  I stayed late at work a couple nights, and even had a day where I stuck my face mostly in front of the computer.

But look!  I lost!  I even lost more than I hoped.  I'd just hoped to be under the 290, not that I would be that far under.  2 pound under it makes me smile.  Smile big.

I've not really started to exercise yet.  I did it a bit and my left calf was screaming at me.  Little by little, no need to run a marathon right now.

What we conquered!

 Summer of 2014 was intense.  It all started with me, we'd found out, via all things, exercise, that my Achilles was behaving badly.  I didn't want surgery until I absolutely had to- and in the spring of 2014, I knew it was time.  Walking hurt and my limp was significant.  An updated x-ray showed that the growth had changed.  The MRI proved that I had no cartilage in most of my foot- the other foot most likely the same.  Doc J wasn't sure how the surgery was going to proceed- but he's figured it would be an hour.  Surgery was scheduled for June 4th, the last week of school, purposely done because he wanted me off it for 3 months.  This way I would be ready to go back to work/school.

 Then in May my husband's heart murmur, which he's had his entire life, decided to behave badly as well.  His appointment, which we didn't think I needed to be there for, as I was saving all my time, ended with a "you need to have surgery now.  Cath lab and begging "can't it wait until October," didn't work in our favor.  They wanted it the 20th of May.  Husband pushed it back, because of my surgery, which I'd planned on pushing back.  But, secretly, I think he just didn't want his birthday to be spent in the hospital.  His surgery was schedule less than 2 weeks after mine.

My surgery ended up being just over 2 hours.  The removed a significant amount of my Achilles and then a section of tendon from my foot to rebuild it.  Doc J promised to send me a picture of him (I begged to keep it, but was told every time- no.)  He did text it to me and it was amazing.

The Hubs mom lives in the same town we do.  My mom came up from my hometown in Texas to help as well, arriving just 3 days after my surgery.    Hubs and I were a hot mess.  My mom took care of me and the house, while Hubs mom took him to appt's and his actual surgery.  I had a post op appt the morning of his surgery.  I couldn't walk, he couldn't lift.  His scars healed faster and prettier than mine.  Today, 6 months out, you would never know he'd been opened however, I still have a limp and am recovering slowly.

I remember how scared we were, it was a tough summer.  My body reacted to the stress and pain by sucking on the pounds, 30 to be exact.  But, I'm not scared anymore, at least in the same way.  Instead, I am scared that my body is going to backfire on me.  I've been so naughty to it and I need to stop.  I've noticed that I am not feeling good most of the time and I hate that feeling.  It's time to take back my life.  I do have 6 more months before I'm released, so I will be careful.  But, I am going to take a stand and make sure I am more in the moment with what I am doing.

My official weigh in- Day #1

292.2 on 1/1/15.

My goal is simple- to go down.

My hope, is to not see 290-anything EVER again.

2014 sucked, I won't let 2015.

It's been a LONG time since I've blogged.  Life has been insane and my body, unfortunately, shows it.  I'm at my heaviest and when I realized it yesterday, I pretty much cried.  

I could blame my Achilles replacement this summer.  6 months of recovery so far, another 6 months to go.  I could blame a new job, on top of going to school, my husband needing heart surgery, and other family drama.  I could keep going on those blames.

Or, I could be very honest and admit, that while my life in the last 7 months has been chaotic as all get out... I also have been slacking.  I've been drinking soda on a near daily basis.  I've not been allowed to exercise like I was, but I was too "I don't like it" with trying new things that I *could* do.  I spent my time laying on the couch or bed, watching movies and reading.  I've become a homebody-- and because of my own choices- my body is suffering.

Bring on 2015, I need to restart.  And I am going to do it.

The MVWLC is starting up tomorrow, we just don't have the funds to do it.  However, I am going to start blogging again and will do my own challenge for myself.